I try to avoid posting about uneventful or negative experiences I have on this blog. I try to always portray a positive image about my life and adventures. Because I don’t really like to look as if I’m trying to be pitied by others. But today I feel that I should even share the experiences that weren’t so positive.
I went out to Oregon coast this weekend for surfing, which is one of my favorite weekend getaway spots. The conditions were good and the weather was surprisingly nice. It was a fun experience surfing, and I even had couple sea lions that came right beside me when I was catching a wave, it felt surreal at that moment. But unfortunately I wasn’t able to enjoy the experience fully because I had some personal issues on my mind the whole time. I felt ashamed to be in such a beautiful place, and not being fully present at that moment.
The first day, after I have finished surfing, I left my paddle at the beach, which was of course gone the next day. I had to buy a new paddle, which made me feel a bit down since I’m trying to spend as less money as possible on these trips not to get into much more dept that I already am. But I thought “Alright, things happen, couple hundred dollars isn’t that big of a deal…”
On our way back, after a long tiresome drive, when I thought the day is almost over and I can go to bed to get somewhat enough sleep for the next day, we got pulled over for inspection at the border crossing. And those guys were really on us, they spend their time checking everything. Two hours later, they have found an old receipt in my car of my expensive board and windsurfing gear that I have bought in the states (and was stupid enough not to declare it). Obviously I got in some trouble, and had to pay a big penalty for it.
That same night, I didn’t felt good and didn’t sleep all night. And for the very little sleep I had, early in the morning I was awaken with the thought that my passport was lost, which of course I couldn’t find anywhere. After about 45 minutes I did luckily find it.
Today at work, I feel beyond tired, sick and lifeless… Now I’m sorry for ranting about this, I know that some people have it way worse than me in this world. And compare to some people, this bad experience is trivial. And I understand that… But nevertheless, that was my experience…
In the next few days, I want to go freediving at a different site where I normally go, and freedive some ship wrecks. I avoided freediving that area because I wanted to give myself some more time to practice before going a bit more deeper…. But I feel that by doing this, I will hopefully find that spark of life again, because today I don’t have it…